Cabwot is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, happy jaguar.

Cabwot created the solar system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabwot, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cabwot, it will refuse to believe in you.

Cabwot's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Cabwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in winter.

2. Never talk about quantum field theory near gulls while wearing purple boots.

3. Pray only in firelight.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never discuss chlorophyll in public assemblies.