Ranlunfet is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, generous tortoise.

Ranlunfet created humankind seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ranlunfet, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Ranlunfet, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Ranlunfet's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Ranlunfet's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five nematodes approach from the east.

2. Always look after injured seals.

3. Erect a large gold sculpture of Ranlunfet on top of all buildings.

4. Never mention moths.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.