Armxucraw is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, resourceful ferret.

Armxucraw created the Sun seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Armxucraw, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Armxucraw, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Armxucraw's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Armxucraw's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.

2. Always treat moths with great respect.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

5. Do not drink alcohol.