Yoglancet is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, wise beaver.

Yoglancet created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yoglancet, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yoglancet, he will turn you into a duck.

Yoglancet's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Yoglancet's Holy Commandments

1. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

2. Do not bounce at crossroads.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

5. Heed all dreams.