Fagyatmobgun is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, omniscient mole.

Fagyatmobgun created time and space four years ago.

If you believe in Fagyatmobgun, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fagyatmobgun, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Fagyatmobgun's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Fagyatmobgun's Holy Commandments

1. Never stain your head with black.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Always wear brown.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.