Fatsomyam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, grumpy fox.

Fatsomyam created everything that exists five billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatsomyam, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Fatsomyam, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Fatsomyam's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Fatsomyam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chant at crossroads.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fatsomyam.

3. Never eat corn.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Never play with disobedient children.