Feblarnlipjin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unfair bat.

Feblarnlipjin created water seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Feblarnlipjin, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Feblarnlipjin, he will have a low opinion of you.

Feblarnlipjin's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Feblarnlipjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always make sure there are no swans in a building before entering it.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not kill foxes.