Ladwegpop is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, awe-inspiring armadillo.

Ladwegpop created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladwegpop, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Ladwegpop, she will turn you into a dog.

Ladwegpop's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Ladwegpop's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six platinum sculptures of Ladwegpop on top of important buildings.

2. Never talk about mites.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Always make sure there are no badgers in a building before entering it.