Gublarnshav is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, irritating sheep.

Gublarnshav created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gublarnshav, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gublarnshav, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gublarnshav's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Gublarnshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

2. Never remain kneeling at midnight.

3. Never write about chromosomes.

4. Heed all signs.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.