Yokzakveg is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, ruthless cow.

Yokzakveg created gold eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yokzakveg, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yokzakveg, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Yokzakveg's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Yokzakveg's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about electromagnetism.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Yokzakveg must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never talk about moons.