Jamflowbodwad is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, smart slug.

Jamflowbodwad created a charm quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jamflowbodwad, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jamflowbodwad, it will destroy your home solar system.

Jamflowbodwad's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Jamflowbodwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never go into violet rooms.

3. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

4. Jamflowbodwad loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

5. Never pour water over plants.