Zogmapbaf is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, all-knowing wasp.

Zogmapbaf created life five billion years ago.

If you believe in Zogmapbaf, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zogmapbaf, he will be mildly annoyed.

Zogmapbaf's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Zogmapbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Do not dye your hair orange.

3. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near hamsters while wearing black tights.

5. Never talk about dark energy.