Gabfebpas is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, blissful coyote.

Gabfebpas created everything that exists eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gabfebpas, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gabfebpas, he will destroy your home planet.

Gabfebpas' most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Gabfebpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never adorn your head with orange markings.

2. Never hop in spring.

3. Do not wear dresses marked with indigo.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.