Jinnartvon is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, proud wombat.

Jinnartvon created the Small Magellanic Cloud five million years ago.

If you believe in Jinnartvon, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jinnartvon, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Jinnartvon's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Jinnartvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not resist chaos.

2. Always share oranges with strangers, but never with ants.

3. Always look after injured dolphins.

4. Never mix limes with water.

5. Do not sprint at mountains.