Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, sapient fairy.

Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup created the planet Saturn two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into white rooms.

2. Always wear magenta.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nuttvonkfomsugpomgup.

5. Always pray immersed in water.