Likrowteenbass is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, passionate crab.

Likrowteenbass created the world eight million years ago.

If you believe in Likrowteenbass, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Likrowteenbass, she will be mildly annoyed.

Likrowteenbass' most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Likrowteenbass' Holy Commandments

1. Never allow swans to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Always help sick birds.

3. Never feed melons to shrews while wearing indigo ear rings.

4. Never think about dwarf planets.

5. Never mix spinach with water.