Gargubwig is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, temperamental dryad.

Gargubwig created the planet Earth six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gargubwig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gargubwig, she will not invite you to parties.

Gargubwig's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Gargubwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair blue.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Feed all hungry seals.