Baftailhendum is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, stupid centipede.

Baftailhendum created oxygen two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Baftailhendum, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Baftailhendum, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Baftailhendum's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Baftailhendum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Baftailhendum in the centre of the settlement.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Baftailhendum.

5. Do not study chlorophyll on holy days.