Hotpakpiddob is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, moody shrew.

Hotpakpiddob created the Black Eye Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Hotpakpiddob, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Hotpakpiddob, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hotpakpiddob's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Hotpakpiddob's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

2. Never think ill of sick foxes.

3. Retreat if five badgers approach from the west.

4. Never eat pineapples.

5. Respect your elders.