Nadyarppib is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, generous grasshopper.

Nadyarppib created Asia three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nadyarppib, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nadyarppib, it will boil you in a big pot.

Nadyarppib's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Nadyarppib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Feed all hungry squirrels.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.