Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, capable manatee.

Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod created a bottom quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Dondotdonsitmispitmumbod's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention badgers.

2. Never feed lentils to goats while wearing shoes.

3. Never talk about special relativity near sharks while wearing turquoise shorts and balancing eight copper spheres on your back.

4. Always wash your face before prayer.

5. Never point your arms toward the north during prayer.