Stiksafmad is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, unselfish skunk.

Stiksafmad created humanity four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stiksafmad, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Stiksafmad, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Stiksafmad's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Stiksafmad's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching titanium.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.