Ranquamcatyakbig is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, humane yak.

Ranquamcatyakbig created silver four million years ago.

If you believe in Ranquamcatyakbig, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Ranquamcatyakbig, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Ranquamcatyakbig's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Ranquamcatyakbig's Holy Commandments

1. Always store tomatoes above ground.

2. Never feed strawberries to seals while wearing boots.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Never carve symbols of asteroids into wood.

5. Never eat green fruit.