Nilcunmig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, temperamental octopus.

Nilcunmig created the Sol system six million years ago.

If you believe in Nilcunmig, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nilcunmig, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Nilcunmig's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Nilcunmig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Never feed gooseberries to bats while wearing red shoes.

3. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Nilcunmig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not drink alcohol.