Fabguprip is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, competent gerbil.

Fabguprip created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fabguprip, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fabguprip, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Fabguprip's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Fabguprip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat peas.

2. Run away from mauve goats, for they are unholy.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think about photosynthesis.

5. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.