Latrakhog is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, thoughtless gerbil.

Latrakhog created the Cigar Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Latrakhog, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Latrakhog, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Latrakhog's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Latrakhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum mechanics.

2. Worship no other gods but Latrakhog.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.

5. Never mix aubergines with blood.