Vagbetpak is a god.
It takes the form of an extremely fat, unsympathetic
slug.
Vagbetpak created the planet Mars four quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Vagbetpak, it will give you lots of grapes.
If you do not believe in
Vagbetpak, it will destroy your favourite planet.
Vagbetpak's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.
Vagbetpak's Holy Commandments1. Never eat bark.
2. Feed all hungry porpoises.
3. Never write about asteroids.
4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.
5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.