Wabbissrut is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, impressive guinea pig.

Wabbissrut created parasitic wasps seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wabbissrut, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wabbissrut, it will turn you into a hamster.

Wabbissrut's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Wabbissrut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair fawn.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Learn seven new languages a year.

5. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.