Tinvagtetti is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, merciless dragonfly.

Tinvagtetti created the Whirlpool Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tinvagtetti, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tinvagtetti, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Tinvagtetti's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Tinvagtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never wear fawn boots.

3. Do not dye your hair brown.

4. Do not speak of fluid mechanics near sacred fires.

5. Always maintain purity during fasting days.