Tinjonjad is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, two-faced yak.

Tinjonjad created everything that exists two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tinjonjad, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tinjonjad, she will not care.

Tinjonjad's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Tinjonjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Tinjonjad must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Tinjonjad in the centre of the settlement.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tinjonjad.

5. Feed all hungry badgers.