Tetti is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, passionate unicorn.

Tetti created life six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tetti, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tetti, it will turn you into a plant.

Tetti's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Tetti's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Tetti loves mites, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Never mention shrews.