Fotken is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, passionate pig.

Fotken created matter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fotken, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Fotken, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fotken's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Fotken's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about chlorophyll.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Do not drink alcohol.