Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, astonishing faun.

Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort created water eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort, she will turn you into a goat.

Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Bedgebgep Dobcadzed Nurtkadort's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear pink.

2. Never eat figs on holy days.

3. Shun those given to sloth.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never chant in holy places.