Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, astonishing parrot.

Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod, she will make you grow a tail.

Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod on top of all buildings.

2. Always make sure there are no swans in a room before entering it.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Put Tomloopquam Damfumwitdod first in all things.

5. Always treat snakes with great respect.