Cembumsidarmneg is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, stupid raven.

Cembumsidarmneg created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Cembumsidarmneg, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cembumsidarmneg, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Cembumsidarmneg's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Cembumsidarmneg's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near geese while wearing white shirts and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your arms.

3. Always wear indigo.

4. Do not eat strawberries.

5. Respect your elders.