Pibhabvol is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, thoughtless dolphin.

Pibhabvol created an up quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibhabvol, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Pibhabvol, it will torture you forever.

Pibhabvol's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Pibhabvol's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about optics near snails while wearing pink shirts and balancing seven gold spheres on your arms.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never wear turquoise dresses on sacred days.

5. Do not take Pibhabvol's name in vain.