Flapgumnar is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, overgenerous dragonfly.

Flapgumnar created dark matter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flapgumnar, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Flapgumnar, she will turn you into a rat.

Flapgumnar's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Flapgumnar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear cyan clothing.

2. Do not shave your legs.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not keep three turtles in a large pit.