Vogkenbonk is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, grumpy mouse.

Vogkenbonk created time and space five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogkenbonk, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vogkenbonk, it will turn you into a frog.

Vogkenbonk's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Vogkenbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not gather at wells at midday.

3. Never leap in the presence of elders.

4. Never feed peanuts to rats while wearing shirts.

5. Do not make images of living things.