Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unfair jackal.

Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut, it will jump up and down on your head.

Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Zodsaklipcanjadbafgut's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat peanuts.

2. Never chant in the presence of bats.

3. Never think about dark matter near monkeys while wearing red dresses and balancing eight carbon spheres on your back.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never eat green fruit.