Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, witty clam.

Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad created the planet Mars three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Japdobmon Yaktofcib Cipfunnartcad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt voles.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never talk about moths.