Camdussvonk is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, conceited goat.

Camdussvonk created a top quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Camdussvonk, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Camdussvonk, she will laugh at you.

Camdussvonk's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Camdussvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not wear blue clothing.

3. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Camdussvonk in the centre of the settlement.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Run away if nine whales approach from the south.