Sigcetfud is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, benevolent jaguar.

Sigcetfud created humanity four million years ago.

If you believe in Sigcetfud, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Sigcetfud, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Sigcetfud's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Sigcetfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of comets into wood.

2. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

3. Do not bounce at rivers.

4. Never record signs.

5. Do not dye your hair white.