Lamfaskab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, sapient giraffe.

Lamfaskab created parasitic wasps five million years ago.

If you believe in Lamfaskab, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lamfaskab, she will turn you into a sheep.

Lamfaskab's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Lamfaskab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics.

2. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Lamfaskab in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force near cats while wearing gray rings and balancing five copper spheres on your hands.

5. Never speak at midnight.