Fenbidhan is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, bad-tempered toad.

Fenbidhan created humankind five billion years ago.

If you believe in Fenbidhan, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fenbidhan, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fenbidhan's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Fenbidhan's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from brown nematodes, for they are unholy.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always cleanse ash with water.

4. Never chant in holy places.

5. Never proclaim while facing north.