Cabkiknurt is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, staggering scorpion.

Cabkiknurt created water eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cabkiknurt, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Cabkiknurt, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Cabkiknurt's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Cabkiknurt's Holy Commandments

1. Always help tortoises in need.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cabkiknurt.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cabkiknurt.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.