Fenjadgepcet is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, impressive spider.

Fenjadgepcet created the cosmos four years ago.

If you believe in Fenjadgepcet, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fenjadgepcet, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Fenjadgepcet's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Fenjadgepcet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Never think about special relativity near ducks while wearing black stockings and balancing six silver spheres on your hands.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fenjadgepcet.

5. Never allow great tits to sleep beneath your roof.