Volvabzen is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, dishonourable wolf.

Volvabzen created an up quark two years ago.

If you believe in Volvabzen, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Volvabzen, she will jump up and down on your head.

Volvabzen's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Volvabzen's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Erect five gold sculptures of Volvabzen on top of important buildings.

3. Always look after injured sheep.

4. Never jump near birds.

5. Never eat green fruit.