Jamkemqueeg is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, fast bird.

Jamkemqueeg created the Virgo Supercluster two billion years ago.

If you believe in Jamkemqueeg, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Jamkemqueeg, it will turn you into a mole.

Jamkemqueeg's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Jamkemqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Run away if seven porpoises approach from the west.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never mention sheep.

5. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.