Litflisfarn is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, grumpy gerbil.

Litflisfarn created vertebrates eight million years ago.

If you believe in Litflisfarn, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Litflisfarn, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Litflisfarn's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Litflisfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics near tapirs while wearing cyan ear rings and balancing three lead spheres on your arms.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Never paint your neck black.

4. Never look at planets.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near otters while wearing orange shirts and balancing eight iron spheres on your feet.