Jancimnil is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, effective hamster.

Jancimnil created an electron nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jancimnil, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Jancimnil, he will destroy your home planet.

Jancimnil's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Jancimnil's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.

5. Always help porpoises.